Zen Talks for Your Heart “Life and Death”

The “Zen Talks for Your Heart” series seeks to reveal the contours of things that are otherwise formless in an attempt to approach their true essence. The theme of this second issue is “what is happiness.” In this issue, we will speak to Ryuko Fujita, a monk of Saihoji, who will share his experiences and thoughts centered on this theme as he reflects on the things he feels from day to day.

For what purpose have we come into this world? No matter what kind of life you lead, death is always waiting for you at the end. Even in the present day, when science has unraveled so many of life’s mysteries, the world that awaits us after death remains a complete mystery. It is entirely natural to experience fear and anxiety toward the unknown, but by exploring the teachings of Buddhism, we can overcome our fear of death and find hints that give us the strength to live.

Life Is Brilliant Because There Is Death

Many people see death as something to be feared and avoided. Buddhism, however, recognizes life and death as two sides of the same coin. You cannot have one without the other. We interviewed Mr. Fujita, a Buddhist monk, to ask him what it means for life and death to be “one.”

“In Buddhism, we do not look at things in a dualistic way. We do not set opposites against each other, like ‘delicious vs. tasteless’ or ‘clean vs. dirty.’ It is the same with life and death. Once life begins, it is only natural for it to one day come to an end. Death is not something we should try to escape from.

Some people might misunderstand me and think that I am telling them to grit their teeth and face all hardships head-on, but that is not what I am saying. What I mean is, rather, that death is something that will come, whether we like it or not, and it is by facing it that we can accept it. We do not know when we are going to die, so we have to prepare ourselves and think about it. That is what Buddhism teaches.”

Also, Mr. Fujita told us that first of all Buddhism originated from the Buddha’s contemplation of death.

“There was an episode in the Buddha's life called ‘the four sights,’ that compelled him to take the cloth. Gautama Buddha was originally a prince of the Shakya tribe, and as such, he was born into a life of great privilege. Growing up in the royal palace, he was never exposed to aging and death, until one day, he went into town and encountered an old man, followed by a sick man. He then came upon a funeral. For the first time in his life, he became aware of life, death and aging. The sight of people suffering from old age, sickness and death troubled him so greatly that he decided to leave his life of privilege and become a monk. In other words, Buddhism began through a reflection on life and death.”

Over 2,500 years have passed since the birth of Buddhism. Times have changed and society has developed, but even today, people fear death and try to keep old age at bay. At the same time, it seems that with the development of modern medicine and other factors, there are fewer opportunities nowadays to think about or be conscious of death. When I asked Mr. Fujita if we truly need to face death, he took up a piece of paper and drew a cross.

“If you want to organize and prioritize your tasks, you can use something called an Eisenhower matrix, which is made up of two axes signifying urgency and importance. You can use this matrix to organize things into four categories: ‘important and urgent,’ ‘important but not urgent,’ ‘not important but urgent,’ and ‘neither important nor urgent.’ In which of these categories would you place death?

Many people would place death in the ‘important but not urgent’ category. These days, people place a lot of importance on time-effectiveness, so they only pay attention to the things that are urgent. As something that is not urgent, they set death aside and do not think about it. But for example when they are told that they only have six months to live, death suddenly moves into the ‘important and urgent’ category, and they panic.”

Mr. Fujita explained that he has experienced death as something that was both important and urgent on several occasions in his life.

“A few years ago, I was on an airplane, when one of the engines broke down. I thought I was done for and wondered how I would write my will. Another time, when I was in Peru, I got swept away in a river and only barely survived, and when I was in a market in Turkey, someone pulled a knife on me.

Fortunately, I survived all of these incidents, and I am still here today. Every time I come face-to-face with death, I resolve to live more firmly in the present. If we can face death without running away from it, then we can make the present shine.

When I talk like this, some people may wonder if these are things you cannot think about until you experience them for yourself. But just think back to the beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic. I believe that everyone felt the proximity of death and began reflecting on the conduct of their daily lives. Even if you are healthy and death is ‘not urgent,’ it is important to take just one day in the month, or even just a small piece of that one day, and take some time to confront death.”

Distinguishing the Constants and the Variables

No matter how much you reflect on death, you will never find answers to questions such as what awaits you after you die.

“In both school and society, we are expected to find answers and solutions. As we grow up, we may even begin to believe that there are answers to our questions about death. But that is simply not the case. Buddhism accepts that. The Buddha was an extremely logical person, and he would have said, ‘If you don’t know the answers to questions about death, you don’t know.’ You can think a great deal about something, confront it head on, and still come out none the wiser. And that is all right. If you don’t know the answers, you don’t know. In my opinion, this tolerant generosity is the one of the best things about Buddhism.

It’s all right not to find any answers, but there is something important that we have to keep in mind when we reflect. To borrow a phrase from the businessman Morioka Tsuyoshi, we must distinguish the constants and the variables. A ‘constant’ is a number that cannot be changed. In other words, it is beyond your control. A ‘variable,’ on the other hand, is something that you can change through your own actions. Life and death are constants. But just because you cannot avoid death, I do not think there is any reason to throw up your hands and give up, saying there is no point in thinking about it. The constancy of death is not something to view negatively. Nobody knows how long they will live, so the important thing is to make the present shine brilliantly, don’t you think?”

Buddhism teaches that happiness is to desire the happiness of others, not one’s own. Also according to Buddhist thought, we are bestowed upon with a life to live, and we live our lives with the power of nature and others. Living is itself a form of ascetic training, and living your life step by step will make you wish happiness upon those around you. If you live with that kind of resolve, those around you will treat others the same way, and the results will come back to you. According to Buddhist thought, ‘Do good and good will follow you,’ and if you do so together we can all create a truly happy world.”

No Matter What Happens, Every Day Is a Wonderful Day

Even if we know that death is unavoidable, the pain of losing a loved one can be unbearable, and recovery can be difficult. How should we face such situations?

“There is a Zen saying: Nichinichi-kore-kojitsu meaning every day is a wonderful day. It reminds us that no matter what happens—even when disaster strikes—you should think of each day as a wonderful day (See Zen Words for Everyday Life Vol. 1). You cannot change the fact of the person's death, so you have to live with the separation. Taking it one step further, Zen teaches us to face forward and go on with our lives, believing that even that death had meaning.”

This way of thinking may sound harsh to people in the depths of grief. It seems to stand in sharp contrast to the gentleness of Buddhism that you mentioned earlier.

“It’s horrifying, isn’t it? While some people will reach the end of their natural lives, others might pass away at a young age. Even so, Buddhism would be telling them to consider each day “a wonderful day.” For example, I once heard about a father who lost his child in a disaster. He holds lectures to share his experience and gives others strength.

Facing death does not mean you have to remain in that space forever. Even if my child passes away, I am still alive. Would I then sit there doing nothing until my own time came? Or would I consider what I could still do with my life? So, the question we are being asked is, what can we really change and what can we not?”

Mr. Fujita said that it is the same when we face our own death. “Let me tell you a story about my own master,” he said, as he shared a personal anecdote.

“This story left a deep impression on me. The husband of one of our parishioners came to see my master. He was in a state of panic, as his wife had just been told that she had only a few months left to live. The man asked my master to write a piece of calligraphy for his wife. My master wrote 好日 (kojitsu)—wonderful day—and handed the paper over to the man, saying, ‘Some things in life may have gone according to plan, while others did not. Please take this and use it to reflect on your life.’ When the wife received the paper from her husband, she was shocked. She was going through the worst moment in her life. How could this be a wonderful day?

However, she then realized that there had been good days, but also many bad days. Once she understood that things do not always work out the way you want them to, her outlook improved, she got her affairs in order, and she ended up living longer than expected.”

Although you cannot change the fact that you die, you can change the days you have left to live. They say that the mind and body are linked. Perhaps her psychological state improved when she began looking at her remaining days as wonderful days, which, in turn, had a positive effect on her physical well-being.

“The fact that she was standing face-to-face with her own mortality may also have played a part in making everything crystal clear to her. I think it is important for all of us to stop and take some time to sort ourselves out.”

In Life, Things Do Not Always Go According to Plan

When we think about death, we realize how strong our attachment to life is. People nowadays talk about “bucket lists”—things they want to do or accomplish before they die—or the YOLO (you only live once) mindset, and indeed, the world is brimming with so many fascinating things to see and do, that you always end up feeling like there is still more you could do.

“Is it even possible to do it all? It is often believed that things will work out as expected, and things will be better with some adjustments. But that is not how life works. Sometimes things simply do not work out the way we want them to.

The world has become more convenient, and, to some extent, we are tricked into believing that things happen as planned. Then, when things do not happen according to plan, we experience stress. If you instead base your outlook on the realization that things do not happen according to plan, then you can appreciate it when things actually do go well. Once you understand and accept that life does not always go the way you want it to, the fear of death evaporates.”

To Lead a Prosperous Life

Accepting the reality of death and trying to figure out how to make life shine can also present you with the opportunity to reconsider what kind of life you want to lead.

“You have to think about what it takes to lead a life of riches. Will you realize that it is possible to live a rich life, even on meager means?

Many people have a problem with wastefulness and inefficiency, but I actually think they are important. Children, for example, do a lot of things that are ultimately quite useless, but I believe that it is these supposedly ‘wasted’ hours that allow their brains to develop. Of course, the children themselves do not care about efficiency. People nowadays discard a lot of things, saying that they are a waste of time, but it is precisely these wasteful things that will lead to true prosperity.”

As we go about our busy daily lives, we tend to seek efficiency and convenience. What can we do to distance ourselves from such a mindset?

“I recommend that you carefully reflect on the way you live your own life. For example, you can set down your smartphone and not touch it for the next hour, or you can minimize your use of social media. Just give it a try. You can start small. When having a meal, do not look at your phone while you eat. Instead, start with a prayer of gratitude and savor the taste of food. If you tend to eat out a lot, stay at home and make yourself a simple meal. It doesn't have to be every day, but once in a while, take some time to reflect on your daily life.”

In closing, Mr. Fujita said that he would like people to reevaluate their own “center.”

“I hope that Saihoji Temple will continue to be a place where you can encounter your true self. If you can come to Saihoji, stand before our garden and reflect deeply on your life.”

Interviewed and edited by: MIYAUCHI Toshiki
Written by: HOSOTANI Kana
Photographed by: OKAMORI Daisuke
*These photos were with permission.

PROFILE

Fujita Ryuko was born and raised in Saihoji Temple. After working for Sumitomo Corporation, a large trading company and traveling back and forth between Japan and the U.S, he became aware of his mission to devote his life to preserving Saihoji and disseminating Zen. He practices Zen training and is the vice head of Saihoji.